(This was written earlier but I couldn't publish it yet!)
C was supposed to be home tomorrow - Father's Day. Before that he was supposed to be in last Tuesday. Long before that - and we didn't tell anyone - he was going to be flying ADVON bringing him home in May. He will be coming in "sometime soon." It's the Army way ... to hurry up and wait, I mean.
And I am soooo ready.
Ready to have him here. Ready for him to tuck the boys in at night. Ready to hear him sing them to sleep. Ready to watch him hang Eli upside down while I freak out at the same time. Ready to see him play baseball with Logan. Ready to cook breakfast together. Ready to hear him coming through the door - everyday. Ready to see that uniform. Ready to fold his clothes again and to make both sides of the bed. Ready to open the bathroom door and have that spice-scented-steam pour out. Ready to complain about the boots he brought inside ... again. Ready to see the Jeeps and trucks and cars in the parking lot of his building. Ready to see soldiers walking in and out knowing that one of them is mine. Ready for the brigade to not look like a ghost town. Ready to meet him for lunch. Ready to have the boys walk into his office and see Logan sit at his desk again. Ready to meet his soon-to-be-new-soldiers and their families. Ready for him to hold me. Ready to smell him. Ready to not sleep alone. Ready to not be scared. Ready to breathe.
I am so ready.
Hurry up and wait.
It's the Army Way.
Hurry up and wait.
I'm waiting.
Now Hurry Up.
This is where I am. SO frustrating after a year away. 'Get on with it,' I want to scream. But it doesn't change anything. So here I sit, practically bouncing, wishing time would pass more quickly, trying to find thing to keep me and my kids occupied.
ReplyDeleteHurry up and wait, indeed.
Love this! I love following your blog. I actually sat and cried again today reading "Closest to the heart"...just as I did the first time I read it so long ago. We're quickly approaching our first deployment and reading your posts have helped my severe anxiety I have had. Thank you for sharing this terribly hard experience...and showing us that we can live through it. So glad your husband is home safe. God bless your family.
ReplyDeleteLorena, you are ALMOST THERE and I am so happy for you! I can't wait to hear that he is home!
ReplyDeleteAmber, THANK YOU! Thank you for reading and sharing. I am so VERY, VERY glad this has been a support/help to you. That is my main goal with this blog. You will not only live through the experience you are approaching with this deployment but you will live ABOVE it if you allow yourself to! Please email if there is any extra support you need! I love to hear from you guys! Safety to your soldier (assuming soldier) and strength to you.