The Grass is Always Greener ...

I have had a difficult time of letting go - of moving forward - and I never thought I would. Certain things have been so different from the ways I have been taught, and shown, and known things to work and to be handled.

Every duty station is different. Every unit is different. Every leader is different. 

And I have been struggling with the difference between my Army post now and my Army home that I knew so well before. Yes, I realize I didn't call this one an Army home because it isn't to me yet. I have been to the point of complete anger at how differently things have been handled, been brought to hot tears, been frustrated beyond words and it isn't like me. Things have happened in a way that disappoints me and discourages me. 

Yesterday I had a very good talk with a very good friend - a very, very well-seasoned spouse - who I have learned more from than most and who is currently on the other side of this country. She said a lot and she listened more. She made me laugh - as she always does - and she faced a certain reality with me.

I am here now.  

"No one is like the 101st. You just need to know that." Yes, yes, we are brainwashed but really ... I mean, duh ... she's right. ; ) (Can I get an "Air Assault"?)

"You'll fix it," she reassured me. 

And, yes, this was mostly a joke because she knows how much of a "fixer" I am but it really got me thinking. No unit is perfect. But some do better than others - and I don't mean one is tougher, or stronger, or one gives a louder "hooah".  I mean the people in them - the leaders, the civilian employees, the volunteers - can do a better job of communicating, promoting camaraderie,  building a "unit" within the unit. 

And I may not know how to fix everything - that isn't up to me - but there are parts that I will be able to control in the near future. There is an effort I can make and that I will make. I can take responsibility for what is around me and take everything that I have learned in my last real Army home and use it here - at my new one.

It will take patience. It will be a transition. It will be a bumpy road but I committed to serve in this life, to persevere, to thrive and to encourage those around me to do the same.  And I believe we all pass it along,  empowerment spreads, and by focusing on the little around you, you can influence the whole.

So I will stop looking back and holding on and criticizing. I am moving forward and holding onto the good to help me to do better, to serve better, to encourage.

No one said it was easy but this isn't anything that can hold me back.